- Some mysterious beastie keeps biting me. I won't go into details, but the range of locations of bites is extremely interesting. Must refrain from scratching in public. Can't work out what the little critters are. I squashed one of the buggers against my wall yesterday. Serves it right for gorging on me. Apparently it might be grape flies. Always knew there was more to wine than bad breath and hangovers.
- French people smoke A LOT. I guess we're spoilt in England with out rules that people actually follow, but it's really noticeable here. The secondary school I work in is near empty at breaktime as students and teachers alike pour out for their fix. The scrum to get out the second the bell rings, fag boxes held aloft like VIP tickets to an exclusive gig is equalled only by the gaggle waiting for the lift up two floors for the great Black-Lung-ed who can't puff and pant their way up to the classroom.
This cancer-stick rant was triggered by a day of travelling where ever train, bus and tram journey involved a cloud of smoke being blown in my face.
I'm still politely British enough to feel I should mention that I have several friends who smoke (although I now sound rather early 20th century bourgeoisie - "yes, we have coloured friends, don't we darling? We're ever so open-minded.") My friends who smoke are considerate and English and pretend to give up sufficiently frequently to be endearing in their habits.
- An almost daily occurence now: the apparent misapprehension of my Franglais.
Me: "J'aime la fondue"
Entire class: "Er...wot?! She likes what? Never heard of it."
Me: "Fondue! It's a local speciality!"
Blank stares.
"You know...fondue!!"
Class: "Fondue? Er..."
Me: "FON-bloody-DUE!!"
Eventually, one bright kid: "Oh - fondue!"
Rest of class: "Aaaah - fondue!"
There are only two syllables. I can't be saying it it that wrong. And this happens daily with different words. Gah!
- Opening hours: I know it's all been said before, but honestly, which bright spark thought that shutting everything for at least 2 hours at lunchtime every day was a good idea? Combine that with everyone having a really long lunchbreak and you've got a Really Stupid Situation.
Problems caused: obscenely early starts, excessively long working days, massive queues in all shops for the 5 minutes a day when they are actually open.
Don't even get me started on Mondays...
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